HORNYPOSTING 🤤

Lady Gaga says she chose not to speak out against rumors of being transgender because she didn’t want to make being trans seem shameful: “I didn’t feel like a victim with that lie and I thought: What about a kid who is being accused of that who would think that a public figure like me would feel shame? I’ve been in situations where fixing a rumor was not in the best interest of the well being of other people.”

If I met Jim Carrey in Yes Man I would ask him for one billion blowjobs. By the second one I'd already be regretting my favor, and by the third it'd be hellish. Several years will go by, there is no end in sight. One billion is a big number. News reporters have 24/7 coverage of the event, around us are mathematicians, philosophers, lawyers, poets, and sexologists all arguing the definitions of the favor. For what would defines a blowjob? The act of orgasming? Ejaculation had seized happening long ago. Each consecutive stroke? A certain passage of time? And one billion? With no way out? No loop holes? If there is one thing they agree on it's an estimate on the amount of blowjobs given, hovering around 80k liberally. Society had fallen long ago, the cadence of the billion BJs are the only thing that exist for either of us. Empires rise and fall and yet we remain, a curse from above for our wretchedness. In some cultures we were revered as gods, in others we were clocks, our movements syncopating almost nearly to the second. Astrologers, after rediscovering trigonometry, were able to measure one full revolution of the sun to about 31,536,000 movements. Crops were planted and harvested by the Jim Carrey blowjob. Festivals dedicated to the gods above, birthdays, anniversaries, debt payments, all in tune to the steady rhythm of the blowjob. One day, with no real indication, the people had stopped coming, yet we continued. The marble temple that surrounded us became overgrown with vines, the deep green wrapped around the large basalite pillars reminded me of what I was long ago, long before I had become the recipient of a billion blowjobs. No longer singular, but plural, I had only existed within the context of receiving a blowjob from Jim Carrey. The rock structures began to fall, the plants began to burn, the animals began to die, the planet was a husk and yet it continued. It will continue, there is nothing but this act, and it is the only act, and it will go on forever. We had no longer known our bodies, we had no longer known movement, things were bright, brighter than they ever were, and so hot, I had thought we approached hell and yet it gave way to a darkness, a darkness I had never known before. There was no feeling, there was nothing, an inky abyss, and yet the rhythms that brought us here still echoed into the blank nothing. We were nothing and yet we were everything, if this was hell then hell had no fury. Hell had no torture. Hell was more of the same, me receiving one billion blowjobs from Jim Carrey. The backdrops change but the dance is eternal. But that too faded, and for the first time in my life I had felt alone. Truly alone. And maybe this was hell, the gradual fade into a blank canvas that contains only your thoughts. I tried to speak but I was mute, I tried to listen but I was deaf, and the light had faded from my world many many years ago. Then a chorus, a beautiful *pop* that sounded like it came from heaven above, and a voice that seemed so distant to me now said "honey, IIIIIII'm finished!" and in an instant I knew that this would be the last act in this existence, a man paying off a favor that he did out of sheer obligation alone. Then it collapsed, then it exploded, and the universe was born anew.

Next question

Cum

What

what will you give us for letting you climax?

Yo can we get to 10k already? I'm edging

THE PUNCHLINE IS PORN